In Country

Day 3 in Ireland.

I was in Dublin proper yesterday.  Reg had an appointment in the city and seeing as we're love drunk like sailors in a foreign port I naturally tagged along.  We figured I'd go on a bit of a wander while she was occupied which, of course, excited me immensely as going to a semi-aimless wander in a new city is one of my favorite things to do while wearing clothes.  On the train ride into the city Regina tried giving me a low-down on the city layout so I wouldn't get mugged or fall into an open manhole or be eaten by the Liffey River monster.  Now, as I am male, I don't do well with directions.   And seeing as Reg's Irish nature leads her to give directions in a highly relative manner, I knew I'd be on my own as soon as she popped into the office. 

We hopped off the train and she asked me one more time if I knew where I was going.  I vaguely consented and she left me on the street.  Before you gasp and tut and wonder what she was thinking I'll have you know I've been in Dublin before, twice actually, the first time being on St. Padraig's day proper.  But still, it's a big town and what with it being a medieval city does not lend itself to easy navigation.  Nonetheless I pressed on down the street waiting to see something familiar by which to get my bearings.  Coming around a long bend in the road I looked over to see Dame Street, the main drag in many ways.  Instantly it clicked, the rumbling sprawl that is Dublin spread out before me as though a map was unfurling itself upon a great oaken table.  I smiled and set out to explore what was already familiar.

In a lot of ways Dublin is a lot like any other big city, the traffic is incessant and tightly packed, the masses move in great waves along it's main arteries and yet in the side streets one can be alone in the chaos, you can buy anything you'd like as long as you can find a proper shop and the scent of a hundred restaurants bombards your olfactory lobes making you want to chow down on kabobs and gyros until you're too sated to stand.  "Yeah,"  Eric said before I left.  "All big cities are exactly the same."  His note was one of mild cynicism and derision.  "I guess so."  I replied.  "But that's kind of a nice thing.  Chicago, Pittsburgh, Oakland, Austin, Dublin, Beijing, Moscow, no matter where you go I guess you're just going to find regular people; people who are a lot like you at the core of things.  I think that unites us, makes us understand that we're connected on the most basic levels."

If you've ever traveled way out of your normal stomping grounds you'll be familiar with the phenomenon of 'Culture Shock'  the symptoms of which are feelings of anger and isolation in your new surroundings.  It's the strange adjustment period where your mind suffers a lag as it comes to terms with the new customs and taboos of your environment.  When I came to Ireland years ago I though I'd be immune seeing as I am generally an open minded person who isn't too picky about food and climate and creature comforts.  It wasn't until after I had left that I realized I went through a nasty bout of culture shock a month or so in where I began to pick apart everything that was 'wrong' with this country.  I will admit, as you might expect, that I felt some trepidation concerning this trip.  I am uprooted and have chosen to make myself a stranger, an anomaly and a man out of place.  I'm trying to re-establish myself on the quick and start running in some ways before I can walk, I realized that the potential for failure is great and the consequences nothing to sneeze at.  But all that, all of the doubt and worry, faded like fog on the bathroom mirror when I looked at the city and recalled it as keenly as I can the city of Pittsburgh.

Reg met me an hour and a half later with good news, I laughed my big, jowly American laugh and kissed her, I picked her up in a massive hug and spun her a quarter turn in the midst of the moving crowd, I held her and smiled and felt like I was in the right place in the universe at the very moment.  That night we drank thoroughly and stayed in bed the next morning well past noon. 

Tonight we are in County Ros Common at her family home.  The Irish Country is truly beautiful and once again I am glad to be back in it.  Well fed and felling welcome a hundred thousand times over we finished up our night watching a movie laying in each other's arms in front of a gently burning fire.  I've never felt happier or more at ease with existence and I'd like to think the feeling will stay with me a while.

Slan for now, and I'll post some pictures when I shoot some good ones.

The big question

At this point I assume that most people reading this know me personally, but for those who just stumbled onto me I owe you an explanation as to why I, A native Yank, am going to Ireland in this, my 24th year of life.  I guess there could be a fair few reason as to why I'm sitting in an airport terminal right now.  Many of them are personal, many are dissatisfactions with life, both mine and the general condition of it on earth.  But I'd prefer not to dwell on negatives at this point, as there is enough unhappiness and malaise in the world as it is, rather, there is one bright and shining reason I'm leaving my homeland today. 

In the June of 2008 I was on a bus bound for Shannon Airport, I'd been staying in Galway for six months at that point studying in my final semester of college.  On that bus withe me were Three people, my brother, who had come to see me and tour Europe in a whirlwind manner.  Christy, my best friend who had chosen to come to Ireland with me over a similar school-sponsored venture in Rome which had been in the works since freshman year.  And Regina, the Irish girl I'd unexpectedly fallen in love with.  Reg and I sat hand in hand sharing a set of earphones and wishing we were anywhere but on a bus that would take me back to America.  Our love was not easy to come by and not easy to live with, a complicated situation as I'm sure you can imagine.  Just the night before, or perhaps it was in the morning, she had said to me, in Gaelic, that she thought she was falling in love with me.  I don't speak Irish but I understood nonetheless.

On that bus it was difficult to say much of anything, with the future so uncertain, with our very existence seemingly coming to a close, what can you say that doesn't seem like empty small talk?  What can you do besides hold on to each other and try to block out the rest of the world?  "You know I love you, right?"  I said, for the first time openly saying it, making what could have easily been a once in a lifetime tryst into something substantial.  Reg looked up at me with her beautiful blue eyes and shot me coldly, "Al, don't just say that because you'll never have to back it up."  Hurt as I was I rebounded.  "I said it because I thought I'd proved it already."

Thus, I've come back to Ireland to keep a promise, one that I've kept up for three years on now, the promise that love is real, it is powerful, and it is not something that should be allowed to wither and disappear from this world.  Whatever happens in my life I'd like to go knowing that I never gave up on love, never ignored it, and never treated it as merely a word and a cliche'.  I'm going to Ireland to love wholly and without hesitation, whatever else follows I know it will be pure because it was done in, and for Love.

Not long at all now

In less than eight hours I'll be boarding a flight for Dublin, Ireland.  It's going to be a three month stay and if things go right it will be the precursor to a new life.  This blog is going to be about my experiences, my thoughts, my struggles and triumphs.  I hope it will make you laugh, and cry, and above all inspire you to chase your dreams like I've decided to chase mine.  The only easy part about this will be getting on that plane, everything up to now has been an odyssey and everything after that will be a battle of my will against whatever forces in the universe conspire against man.  The human spirit is stronger though and I set out to prove that.  I thank all of my friends who have supported me at any point in my life and I look forward to the new faces and places I'll endear myself to.  Until next time, Slan.